Welcome To The Asylum
2010
The Xeroxide Blonde Bombshell of 'B' movie bliss productions, The Asylum, is about to unleash a plethora of videomatic marvelousness upon the planet in 2010. A wet fish slap in the face of Hollywood, and a welcome kick to the nut sack of political incorrectness not seen in over two decades. Taking the blueprint of 'A' list Action flicks and deftly designer draping their cinematic kissin' cousins, often before Elvis has even left the blockbuster building !.
A breath of brash yet bold tongue in cheek cheekiness that cannot help but bring entertainment to the masses at a fraction of the cost, and with ever improving delight in the quality of the productions on offer.
Having revelled in the counterparts of I Am Legend and Snakes On A Plane, with The Asylum's interpretations as, I Am Omega & Snakes On A Train, other delights such as Monster, their take on the brilliant Cloverfield, and Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes are awaited with excited glee.
Okay, along the way movies such as Mega Shark Vs Giant Octopus and particulary Death Racers, oh dear lord !, push even the audacious boundaries of 'B' moviedom to the barest extremes of watchability. Still, there is pretty much always something Fun to find within these low budget flicks, and for that we applaud you, The Asylum.
Even Indiana Jones isn't safe from the 'B' movie make over as the fictional Allan Quartermain is resurrected in The Asylum's adventure, Allan Quatermain And The Temple Of Skulls. That of course isn't the only short round they intend to spar, as early 2010 sees The Asylum's take on Sherlock Holmes hounds the big budgeted baskerville from Guy Ritchie, as if Madona hadn't already taken a big chunk out of his ass with Swept Away !. It's schlock, stock and two smoking 'B' barrels into the butt of tinsel town, as The Asylum sees the new year in with the resolution to Entertain.
Looking ahead with mouth watering fantasy flicks Princess Of Mars, which seems to follow John Carter, prior to the character heading up the likely two hundred million dollar plus production in the making of John Carter Of Mars !?. The paranormal home invasion take on 2009's surprise box office hit Paranormal Activity comes in the guise of Paranormal Entity.
The exciting prospect of a Western revival on the new decades horizon comes care of The Asylum with 6 Guns. A 'Sure Fire' holster bolster hit in the making as The Asylum continue to build their entertainment empire, all guns a blazing.
The Asylum movies rumour mill is of two potential 'B' movie blockbusters on the horizon. Pin your eyelids open and glue your eyes to The Asylum website for future news, and highly anticipated confirmatory word on the makings of ... Mega Piranha and 7 Voyages Of Sinbad. Long live the Faux Flicks and long reign The Asylum.
For more goodness and all the updated news on releases from The Asylum, drop by their site and revel in the 'B' movie goodness that is, and is to be:
http://www.theasylum.cc/
I'm looking forward to the Sherlock Holmes-flick, and I'm very curious how they will pull it off with historical city-locations and so on - and in London to. I'm very fond of I am Omega, Monster and Transmorphers, so this will be a fun year.
ReplyDeleteAll I will say is "I tried." I gave The Asylum the college "try", and I just cant do it anymore. The films are too serious to be camp, but too terrible to be guilty pleasures for my taste, but I certainly respect their prompt turnarounds and brilliantly misleading box covers causing all too many people to mistakingly rent their pics at the video store
ReplyDeletePS - stop on by for your award thats going up tonight Paul!
ReplyDeleteMy first time to your site - very cool.
ReplyDeleteI used to think The Asylum's films were at least good for a laugh (hell I even reviewed a few myself back in the day), but lately their schtick is getting old to me. Rise of the Terminators was the last straw for me. If i do watch anither one, it migth be Paranormal Entity, but I am sure I'll regret it. But I do give The Asylum credit for somehow using their wits to get out of that lawsuit with FOX after AVH. Guess they are going to be around for a while.
Hey Geof, thanks for stopping by, great to have you on board. Thank you for the positive vibe.
ReplyDeleteI hear what you say about The Asylum. I've been lucky I guess in seeing perhaps their two most entertaining & pretty well made in I Am Omega & Snakes On A Train. What they do well though is not outstay their welcome. Ninety minute movies with not too long between silly Action scenes is just what the doctor orders for a trashy evening treat after a hard day at the office. Good luck to them in my humble view, just so long as they don't start believing that what they make is anything other than schlock low grade 'B' movie silliness. Thanks again Geof :) .